Monday, June 05, 2006

Being Me.

22nd day in my first job. Wonderful so far. People are great and supportive. I seem to have the right work/life balance (but, too soon to make such statements…right?) Except for one small problem…

I am a member of a networking site, where a few of my company people have formed a community of sorts. Since I received an invitation to join in, I did. This community also has some people who have left the company for some time now; reasons for which – I do not know.

It all started with nice welcome messages and introduction. Then the ex-employees began sending me vague messages about the company being not a very good place to be in. About the company doesn’t pay too well compared to most other upcoming firms (read-IT/ ITES/ BPO/ Consulting Houses. Our company doesn’t even remotely compete with such organizations!). I got the feeling that he wanted to reaffirm his ill-faith about the company by listening to me say something on similar lines. I could shut him up then, but I know he will try it with others too.

I don’t know why people try to be “guardian angels” for others. They try to come forward, without being asked to, and want to sway our perceptions towards a certain side, one where they would like to create a strong hold for themselves, be leaders of a group that’s anti-something. That, for many, seems to fulfill their power motive. Leaders of thought, however meaningless and unimportant – any day more powerful than leaders in physical force.

I only asked him to let me have the time to form my own opinion about the company. I did not want to be influenced by what others faced here. Experiences shape our perceptions, but I feel, it also happens the other way round. Our existing perceptions also shape our experiences. If I base my perception of my work place on what my “well-wishers” have to say, my experience will not be good, for I shall start seeing everything in a poor light. All attempts of the company to make me feel welcome would be seen as fattening the goat before devouring it.

I am not saying that these “well-wishers” were trying to turn me anti-my company. Maybe they are trying to help me. But, no thanks! I’ll ask for help when I need it. The least I can do to remain myself, is to have my own experiences and judgments backing my decisions and opinions, for life. And there lies the need to be objective.